As I Grow

Once, I played with toys;
now I am a toy for others.
I loved diving into the mud;
now I am scared of every colour.

Life was as easy as a video game —
and all I do now is cry;
I lost more of myself as I grew up.

It was all parties and joy;
now it all shows the odds against you.
The sleepless night before the day of the trip
turned to sleeplessness in anger and agony.

Laughter had no other reason; no —
a crying devil before every fake smile.
Hardest, once, was working hard —
then it became working hard just to die.

Every day was once another smile.
I always knew the world had different faces,
but it was never such a heavy thought
as it is now, as I grow up.