यूँ तो हर रोज़ सुबह होती ही है,
दिन भी गुज़र ही जाता है किसी तरह से।
पर कुछ तो है — एक ख़लिश-सी,
जो मन के किसी कोने में चुपचाप छुपी रहती है।
एक कशमकश है, जो हर रोज़ रूबरू होती है;
दिल पर छा जाती है — बेबस कर जाती है।
सोचें तो जीवन में सब कुछ पाया है;
आजकल के लिए कुछ भी बाक़ी नहीं लगता।
एक उम्मीद से भी ना-उम्मीद-सी ख़्वाहिश,
एक फ़रियाद से भी बड़ी नज़्म कहने चली —
कुछ पा लेने की, कुछ खो देने की।
बस यही है, आजकल मेरी गुफ़्तगू…
In the mirror of your eyes, I see a younger me,
a tapestry of dreams, fears, and boundless possibility.
You whisper to my soul the echoes of what’s past,
guiding me with clarity, through shadows that were cast.
You, a beacon bright, my future self unfolds —
a vision of potential, where aspiration holds.
No need to impress, or don a masquerade;
in your presence, I am free — no truths are left unsaid.
As steady as a mountain, I stand firm and true;
as wild as the wind, I wander, chasing skies of blue.
With fire’s fierce passion, my spirit is alive;
and like water, I adapt — embracing change, I thrive.
We converse in whispers, in a space beyond time,
unjudged and unbound, our spirits intertwine.
In the refuge of our words, we explore and unfold,
finding solace in the silence, where our stories are told.
Though troubles may arise, they are but a fleeting night;
we name them, and we face them, in the morning’s light.
The world may not fathom the depths we’ve explored —
but in our kindred silence, our truest selves are stored.
There is a Coldplay song — “The Scientist” — that I have been listening to for a long time; and every time, it hits me hard, and makes me wonder about beginnings and endings.
Is it merely a concept — a particular thing happening within the framework of time? Or are we actually bound by some existential feeling, about the metaphysical boundary of beginning and end?
I know there is no single answer to it — just like Albert Einstein’s efforts toward a Theory of Everything. But still, I choose to believe that we can work in the direction of understanding the concept behind it.
Today, I woke up with you beside me. I didn’t notice anything unusual; I didn’t feel anything special. Then you reminded me — it’s the 12th of August, our sixth-month anniversary.
Oh god, I forgot it.
Then I thought: how, and why? And now I know why — because with you, my every day is so special that I don’t feel anything “special” today. Special is you, to me — not a date. Special is your smile, not just a reminder.
You are so special that I want to do everything for you. I didn’t feel anything unusual, because you are so usual to me; it is unusual, to me, that I am with you at all. Often, when you sleep, I lie by your side and watch you — and trust me, every time, I think of just one thing: that I am so lucky to have you. You are so unusual that I am still not sure how I got you.
Babu, I love you.
We are welcoming a new year, carrying so many beautiful memories of the last — and I am lucky enough to have one memory that will stay with me forever; and, as lovers say, till the end: you.
Last year, on the same date, around the same time, I happened to be with my friends in Goa. While everyone was busy in drunken talk, I was looking at the waves on Baga beach. For a moment, I was filled with loneliness and solitude — but then your smile came across my thoughts, and I was calm, like the sea after the waves.
The year 2015 gave me so much — so many memories — but the one I just told you will always be with me. We had many quarrels, and each one taught me one and only thing: that I can’t live without you. We made many important decisions of our life this year — telling each other’s parents, getting married, and being ready to do every small thing for it. I scared you many times with my anger, and I am hopefully looking to fix that in the coming year, for us.
I am certainly not a very expressive person, but I will do everything for our small family — and for our extended family as well. I am not making any resolution this year, because I am very bad at keeping them; but I want to promise you one thing: I will put in every effort, for us. And I am looking forward to my most beautiful year, 2016 — because I am marrying you this year.
I don’t express myself very often this way, but one of the many things you have improved in me, is this.
Happy New Year, my love. I love you.
I will embrace everything of yours — love or hate, care or anger, passion or quiet.
I don’t love you only when you are loving, and caring, and sweet;
I love you for everything:
your angry face — I just want to tease you;
your sad face — I just want to hug you;
your tense face — well, you know.
You are not something to me — you are everything.
The farther I see you, the more I yearn for you;
the closer I am with you, the more I fear losing you;
an estranged desire to have you,
and the little things I do to make you mine.
The way I dream about you, the more I feel you;
close or far, whatever you are,
I imagine you mine, even more —
and in the little things I do for love, I love you more.
Thereby, I allow you to be mine —
just mine, and always mine,
and you shall be my forever,
till you can feel me in your arms,
no matter how far, but still in sight.
Thenceforth, I allow you to make me happy:
every time you smile,
every day you are with me,
everything you do for me.
Henceforth, I give you my dreams, and my life —
for each second, and each breath,
for each night I spend with you,
for each day I whisper: you are mine.
Till you can feel me in your arms,
no matter how far, but still in sight.
You make me crazy, either way —
and I wonder if I am addicted to you;
you make me smile, anyway —
and I think the only reason is you;
you make me love anything —
and I just want everything to be you;
you make me happy —
and I know it is because of you.
Undoubtedly, you are the best thing that has happened to me.
I know it is very hard to live life with me, but I promise: I will keep trying to understand you, more and more — and not to be so serious.
I really want everything to work out well. I know it will — but somewhere, somebody has to take the pain of it, and I don’t want it to be you. So I will.
And no doubt, because of that, I am no longer the very cool person I once was; but my love for you hasn’t changed, not a little — it is the same as it always was, and as it ever will be.
I love you. And I am sorry for upsetting you.
ज़िन्दगी भी मस्त खेलती है —
मैं चलना सीखता हूँ, ये भागने लगती है;
मैं भागना सीखता हूँ, ये रुक जाती है;
मैं रुकना सीखता हूँ, ये बदल जाती है;
मैं बदलना सीखता हूँ, ये समझ नहीं आती;
मैं समझना सीखता हूँ, ये उलझ जाती है;
मैं सुलझाना सीखता हूँ — ये फिर चलने लगती है।
मैं फिर चलना सीखता हूँ…